Growing and Healing

I started chemotherapy early May and the hair on my head steadily fell off until a few straggly bits were left. Then Reuben helped shave me and I was totally botak (bald).

It's been 4 months since my last chemotherapy on Aug 28,2008. After that last chemo, I lost just about all my eyelashes and eyebrows as well. They've finally grown back and even the hair on my head is now growing steadily. Praise the Lord for making bodies that are amazing in their ability to grow, regenerate.

Yesterday's oopherectomy went well. I was very drowsy from the general anesthetic and was drifting in and out of sleep until about 9 pm when Reuben and Alisha came to take me home. After getting home I just changed into PJ and promptly fell asleep.

Thank you for supporting my family and me in prayer. Today I experienced some soreness and some tiredness but otherwise am very well.

You made my whole being; you formed me in my mother's body. I praise you because you made me in an amazing and wonderful way. What you have done is wonderful. I know this very well. You saw my bones being formed as I took shape in my mother's body. When I was put together there, you saw my body as it was formed. All the days planned for me were written in your book before I was one day old. Psalm 139:13-16 (New Century Version)

Chemo Cycle 2

Today was cycle 2 of chemo. I was getting ready to go for my chemo treatment when Reuben and I decided my straggly hair looked too bad. He decided to help me shave it all off. At first the long hair kept getting jammed and stuck in the shaver. After some trial and error, we used scissors to cut it short before shaving. Here is a photo of me bald. (if you click on the photo, you get a bigger image).

My kids were very affected by my baldness even though we had allowed the hair loss to happen gradually. I told them it means the chemo is working because it kill the cancer cells as well as fast growing good cells. And we can look forward to the hair growing again.

As a result I was 15 minutes late getting to the doctors. These 2 show me dressed up and ready to go out. Quite a cool hat - my sister Lilian got it from the US and my sister-in-law's mum carried it and a few other pieces back for me. Lilian knows I like neutral colours. I dressed the hat up with my own scarf. Some other patients at the hospital still stared, so i just smiled at them.

I had my blood test done first then waited for the results and had my consultation with the doctor. Praise the Lord, the tumor has definitely shrunk. It was very hard and quite defined when I was first diagnosed. Now it is more diffuse and softer to the touch. The lump (consisting 4 smaller tumors close together) measured about 6x7cm then and now it is about 3x3.5cm. The lymph nodes have also shrunk! God is gracious to me.

As the blood test was good, i was able to proceed with the drug infusion - same drugs as the first time but dosage of carboplatin was recalculated based on blood test. Dr Karmen Wong asked me again about the side effects I experienced and then prescribed some medicine to control them and make me feel even more comfortable.

Chemo started at 10.45 am and lasted till 2.20pm. By about 12.30pm I started to have hunger pangs. Managed to contact Vera and ask her to bring me some food when she came to pick me. Thank you Vera! After getting home I had some salad and fried rice before having a nap. I felt really tired - didn't sleep so well last night.

Cycle 1 Wk 1

Praise God for the 1 week milestone which I passed yesterday. I must report that while I expected the worst side effects, I only experienced them very minimally. Fatigue, some aches and pains, queasiness on a couple of days, runny stools, sore gums - that's about it.

Yesterday, I went back to the doctors to have a blood test (full blood count). My white blood cell count was low so I had to have booster jabs for 3 consecutive days. The nurse gave me the injection in my tummy fat. Instead of going back today and tomorrow for the injections (waste of time, parking charges - astronomical in Gleneagles) I said I will do it myself or get someone to do it.

I could have asked my mum to help - she's a midwife by training - but I chose to inject myself. Maybe it's just my stubborn streak. It was not too difficult and years of watching my mum do it for her patients gave me confidence to do it!

Today I was reading my BSF notes on Matthew 8 about the Roman centurion who asked Jesus to heal his servant. He is an example of living by faith and not by sight!

5When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help. 6"Lord," he said, "my servant lies at home paralyzed and in terrible suffering." 7Jesus said to him, "I will go and heal him." 8The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." 10When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith. 11I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven. 12But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." 13Then Jesus said to the centurion, "Go! It will be done just as you believed it would." And his servant was healed at that very hour.

The notes say, "The centurion's faith was absolute. He did not need to see at once the answer. Christ's word was enough. He knew he had already received the answer to his prayer and was content to wait until he reached home to see it. Faith is being sure of what we do not see (Hebrews 11:1)." Amen!