Growing and Healing

I started chemotherapy early May and the hair on my head steadily fell off until a few straggly bits were left. Then Reuben helped shave me and I was totally botak (bald).

It's been 4 months since my last chemotherapy on Aug 28,2008. After that last chemo, I lost just about all my eyelashes and eyebrows as well. They've finally grown back and even the hair on my head is now growing steadily. Praise the Lord for making bodies that are amazing in their ability to grow, regenerate.

Yesterday's oopherectomy went well. I was very drowsy from the general anesthetic and was drifting in and out of sleep until about 9 pm when Reuben and Alisha came to take me home. After getting home I just changed into PJ and promptly fell asleep.

Thank you for supporting my family and me in prayer. Today I experienced some soreness and some tiredness but otherwise am very well.

You made my whole being; you formed me in my mother's body. I praise you because you made me in an amazing and wonderful way. What you have done is wonderful. I know this very well. You saw my bones being formed as I took shape in my mother's body. When I was put together there, you saw my body as it was formed. All the days planned for me were written in your book before I was one day old. Psalm 139:13-16 (New Century Version)

Von Teo Family

Our church had a Family Christmas Eve service this year and the theme was Eternal Praise. We had participation from different groups in church fom the children to the elderly in our Mandarin ministry.

We had testimonies of the way God had answered prayers, given us miracles, our sermon was about how in the midst of chaos, suffering, unanswered questions we can know a God who has put in motion his plan of restoration and will bring it to completion.

Our family gave an item, we sang a hymn Thou Didst Leave Thy Throne. You can follow the link below and watch it. The execution was certainly not perfect but we hope you enjoy it.

http://www.arpc.net/sermons/2008/christmas/teofamilysong.MP4

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am. And you know the way to where I am going.” John 14:1-4 (New Living Translation)

Christmas Lunch

Today we had a family Christmas lunch with my brothers Harry, Paul and Paul's family (Ai Vee, Natasha, Felicia, Lucas).

We also had the privilege of hosting the Children's Church leaders who've been teaching Alisha, David and Janice this year and a few friends from church

We had a yummy spread of sushi, roast beef, Vietnamese salad, prawn salad, scalloped potatoes. My sis-in-law Ai Vee prepared scrumptious Javanese chicken & BBQ ribs. And for dessert, fruits, tiramisu, home made log cake, gingerbread house, red bean soup with mochi.

We ate, talked, ate some more, sang carols, played Guesstures... a wonderful time.

Christmas 2008

Reuben and I with Jonathan 13, David 10, Spyke (2human years), Alisha 12 and Janice 8

Christmas is just 4 days away...

Unlike my children who cannot wait for birthdays, Christmas, new year to come because they will be older, I am usually less enthusiastic about them... more work for me to do!

In fact, I usually feel melancholic at this time of the year. This has happened without fail for the past few years. This melancholic mood will invariably "descend" on me before Chinese New Year, before my birthday and before Christmas. I'm not sure if everyone else past middle-age feels this way about the passing of time, getting older...

This year I feel differently. Given my cancer diagnosis and treatment since April 2008, turning 44 in October was a very happy milestone for me. Being able to celebrate this Christmas with my family, to see out the year 2008 brings joy to my heart. I think I will no longer feel sad about growing older. Each day, each week, each month, each year is a bonus, a gift... to be received with gratitude and joy.

So to friends and loved ones near and far, I take this opportunity to send Christmas greetings from my home and my family, to you and your families:

As you celebrate the birth of Jesus,

may you have the love, joy, peace and hope

that comes from knowing Him as Saviour, Lord and King.

Blessed Christmas!

Luke 2:10-11 The angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great JOY that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord."

Heartbreaking News

Received an e-mail today from my friend Sock Kim, who attends the same church we do. She was diagnosed with nasopharygeal cancer 2 years ago and underwent treatment.

Her latest scan shows 3 nodules (tumors) growing in her right lung. She will be going for a major lung surgery on Mon, 22 Dec 2008 to remove them. The surgery is scheduled at 8am & will take about 2-3 hrs.

Do join me to pray for this Sock Kim. Her blog www.sockkim.blogspot.com gives details and her prayer requests as follows:

Please pray that :

• the Lord will guide Prof Koong & his medical team as they perform this delicate surgery.
• nothing will go wrong during & after the surgery (eg no infection, stroke or bleeding).
• the surgery will be successful in removing all the affected areas in the right lung.
• there will be no or minimal post-surgery side-effects (eg numbness, pain).
• whatever the result (malignant or benign), the Lord will grant me His strength & peace as I go through yet another trial.

Oopherectomy

Oopherectomy is a new word I learnt this year, it means the surgical removal of ovaries.

When Dr KW first spoke to me about hormonal therapy, she asked if we planned to have any more children. I gave an emphatic "No". Reuben and I are outnumbered as it is... haha! Since I'm done with all my child-bearing, I have no issues undergoing hormonal therapy.

My cancer is hormone receptor positive - the hormone estrogen in my body turns on and stimulate the growth of breast cancer cells. Hormonal therapy (or "anti-estrogen therapy) blocks this stimulation and growth.

The drug most commonly in hormonal therapy is tamoxifen. It blocks estrogen receptors on the cells. Another type of drug which is more effective in my type of cancer is the aromatase inhibitor (AI)which lowers estrogen production. Estrogen is normally produced by the ovaries and also by fat cells in the body. AI is only effective in post-menopausal women (when estrogen is no longer produced by the ovaries).

So in order for the aromatase inhibitor to work well, i have to become post-menopausal. There are 3 ways to achieve this:

1. taking a drug Zolodex by injection into the abdominal fats every 3 months to suppress the ovaries - expensive option as I will take this for 5 years. Also pointless as after stopping this drug I will be 49 and going into menopause anyway;
2. having ovaries "zapped" by radiation to inactivate them - easiest and least invasive but the radiologist says it may not always work;
3. taking the ovaries out by surgery - oopherectomy! - most effective option.

So I will be having a key-hole surgery the week after Christmas to remove my ovaries. It will be a day surgery. Will post date later.

1 Thess 5:16-18 Be joyful always, pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.

End of Radiotherapy

It's been 10 days since my daily radiotherapy (RT) sessions ended on 9 Dec 08. That was also the day of my appointment with Dr SL. She advised me to be gentle with the skin as some parts of it could break anytime. PTL that has not happened - I joked that I had "thick skin".

I saw what RT can do to the skin. There was a man I saw daily undergoing RT on his neck. The skin on his neck had broken and was "raw" and weepy. His daughter applied cream on it after radiation but it looked like the cream would not stick... I can just imagine the agony he was going through.

By the last day of therapy the skin on the right side of my chest and under the armpits were red in some parts and very brown in others. The therapists told me that it takes about 2 weeks for the side effects to go away. Right now, the skin is mostly brown, a bit leathery dry, some parts feel a bit more tender & sore but on the whole bearable. Aloe Vera gel is cooling and very helpful and I apply QV cream for the dryness.

Thank you for praying.

Psalm 121 A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills— where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
3He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
5The LORD watches over you— the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
7The LORD will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life;
8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and for evermore.

Homemade Christmas Cards

We have not been sending Christmas cards for several years now... just never got organised enough to do so.

This year the children and i decided to make some Christmas cards to send to relatives and friends. The girls were very diligent and the boys contributed some.

It takes quite a bit of time and effort to make these cards - we managed to make only 60 and it took many days but I think it was well worth it. We had lots of fun letting our creative juices flow. The benefits for me: lots of quality time interacting with the kids, seeing their personalities and character come out, learning lessons together.

So to my biased eyes, these are absolutely the most beautiful cards. They were made with love. We are sorry not to be able to send everyone one.

Reunion

Last Saturday, 6 Dec 08, we had a reunion with a small group of friends at my home. We all hail from Batu Pahat, a small town in Johor.

Back (L to R): Rosie Soh, Linda Khoo, Linda Tan Lai Yin, Tee Ling Ling, Chin Wei Leong

Front (L to R): Reuben, David Khoo Swee Peng, me, Leslie Lim, Christina Khaw Mei Lin, Diane Teo Lai Yong

Rosie and Linda Khoo had travelled from Johor Baru, Christina Khaw Mei Lin from Penang and Diane Teo Lai Yong from Subang. The rest of us live in Singapore. Christina and Diane are friends from secondary school, while Ling Ling, Linda Tan, Rosie, Linda Khoo are friends from primary school days. The 3 guys are a year older than us and friends from Sunday School and church Youth group.

It's wonderful to be able to catch up and see how every one has changed and grown. We chin wagged over coffee, chocolates, ta pow lunch of Katong Laksa and otah.

In July when Rosie, Linda Khoo and Sue Ping visited me, we had planned this Dec reunion in Singapore. Although not many could make it, it was really fun and noisy. I felt very privileged to have them travel so far to visit me.

Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.